sometimes its ok to say enough...

So today in Tucson was the dreaded 5k run day at my crossfit gym and if you follow the main site its up there too. Normally I don't mind running, I'm actually pretty descent at shorter distances. I will fully admit I suck at long distance running yet I was actually kinda excited to tackle this beast in the heat. Well I was completely humbled today by a 5k run something that seems so natural yet so hard for so many people. I was able to finish a mile of the run before I just quit. My body literally told me NO. After the first mile my calves and lower back were seizing up so bad that each step felt excruciating, there was no way I would be able to do it two more times.

It pained me to walk away from a work out, It pained me to write DNF next to my name. Mentally I wanted to keep going, I wanted to move forward... but physically I just couldn't do it and honestly I don't need to hurt myself anymore than I already am at this point. The thing is that sometimes its OK to say when enough is enough, it is OK to tap out.

This is something I really need to work on.  Today was a step forward in terms of listening to what my body was saying physiologically. Then again I more than likely shouldn't have started the workout to begin with. While crossfit is about not giving up, it is about doing your best, it is about putting so much effort forward that you leave it all on the floor at the end. However, there comes a point when you have to say how much more can my body handle? Today for me it was only a mile run which I guess I shouldn't be disappointed in given my recent state. But, at the same time its extremely frustrating to start something you just cant finish. Mentally it is hard as well thinking back to all the times I shouldn't have finished but I did.

I can say that the entire experience is entirely humbling, what it has shown me is that I cant take anything for granted, that on any given day circumstances change. There is a difference between pushing through pain and pushing through weakness and today I listened to the cues i needed to be safe in my workout and my own skin. I am not proud about not finishing a workout in fact it will bother me until I do a 5k again. I am proud of listening to myself and realizing the difference between pushing my body and protecting it.