Mountains beyond mountains

Remember when you were younger and it was okay to dream? I do I remember fantasizing what life would be like when I was all grown up. Who I would be, what I would do, and where I was going. it became a game for my friends and I. Inevitably life lead back to the idyllic American dream of the 2.5 kids, house, family, and the seemingly obtainable career... sometimes I was an actress, other times an adventurer.  It seemed so easy to know it all back then, to define a life without limitations.

Now that I reflect upon it i have changed my mind a million times in 26 years. I have come to the conclusion that in the beginning I started my path because it was what I should do, not what I wanted to do in actuality. It lead me to amazing places and discoveries, I went from wanting to be a doctor, to wanting to be a lawyer, to realizing I wanted to help the world. Yet somewhere along the way I lost the sparkle i used to see the world with. I lost the Idea that I could do, be, see anything I wanted. The world became grey and dingy and I learned the sting of disappointment and heartbreak... I lost sight of the mountain peak.

 This is an idea I have thought a lot about the past few months. Dreams and reality why cant they be one in the same? Why do we separate one as unobtainable, and settle for less? Ive come to the conclusion that its because Ive lost my sparkle. The way I saw the world when i was a little kid. Everything was new and obtainable. I was filled with ideas that i could do anything, that i was untouchable. Instead Ive become hardened to "reality", where I am forced to choose between dreams and life, should and want, passion and money. Yet I KNOW that this isn't all there is to life that it wasn't meant to be seen in black and white but rather a full spectrum of bright colors. That the mountains of life only look unscalable from the bottom.

The truth is the unscalable mountain is shorter than one might imagine. That dreams are closer to reality then we can even fathom them being. its all about taking the extra step to get there. Not settling for good enough but... for the best. While life will always be a series of peaks and valleys, happiness and heartbreak, disappointment and courage, conquering and falling, and every emotion and action in between... it is not impossible to climb the mountains of our dreams. For me its all about gaining that innocent sparkle I've lost, to stop controlling myself with all the should's in the world and embodying the will to see and be my dreams.

It is no longer about climbing one unclimbable mountain but mountains beyond mountains... there is no turning back or running away... envision it and it will be. Leave the darkness and take hold of the light within me to achieve the impossible. Dreams are no longer a measure of impossibility but rather a step towards the peak of the next mountain, they are the measure and light towards whats to come and what will be, my dreams are my future and my reality.